Our Lives in Ordinary Time

Something you may not know is that I was a little Catholic schoolgirl; yup, navy blue tunic, knee socks, pigtails, scary nuns, and kindly priests, the works. Our school year was punctuated not only with homework and tests, but by the annual Easter procession, live Christmas pageant and lectures on true sacrifice during Lent (which for me was no TV). While I have left the knee socks and pigtails behind (and scary nuns) I have retained the wonderful rythmns of the Catholic liturgical year. In my internal calendar that marks the most private, precious events of my life I celebrate not only the biggies like Christmas and Easter, but those lesser appreciated times such as Advent and Lent. I have learned to love and value those seasons of preparation and denouement. But my favorite season has always been the least appreciated one: ordinary time. It means nothing is happpening save the daily rounds and small rituals of every day life. There is nothing to preapre for, nothing to clean up after. It is just that, ordinary time, and I have come to realize how very special it is.

In my old life I don't think I had ordinary time. There was a house to keep, a cottage to renovate, a job to do, and garden to cultivate, family to attend to and friends to see. There was no time for ordinary time. But here life is different for us. It is partly because I have divested myself of most of those former obligations; its much easier to have ease when I don't work, own a home, have a garden or cottage, and our family obligations consists of weekly Skype chats. Its also partly that life with a small child has forced us to slow down, take time for play and be home for an early bedtime and so we simply can't be as busy. But both Greg and I have realized how much we have come to love, and need, ordinary time. Ordinary time gives us time to relax, to play, to spend time as a family.....to simply be.

And so what do we do? There is usually an obligation or two in the form of housework, so a bit of cleaning or laundry quickly sets the apartment to rights. We take time over our coffee and breakfast, lounging in our jim jams. Greg surfs the 'net. I scrapbook a little, or write a letter.William ping pongs between us, delighted to have two parents on hand to pester and play with. Then there is often a nap, sometimes for all of us, and afterwards maybe a saunter through the market or a trip to the gym. I use the Stairmaster and Greg lifts a little weight while running after William. Sometimes we'll all swim or go for a coffee. And there is always a visit to the park somewhere in there! In winter we might take in a more obscure exhibit that we've been waiting to see, or take advantage of 'free Sundays' when the big monuments are open gratuit. In summer we might do a walking tour or head out on town to wander a fine park or estate. We emerge from this routine rested, connected to each other, and happy.

And, so with our return home advancing ever more surely on the horizon, the question for me is how to preserve ordinary time? How to go back to work, buy a new house, coexist with our family without losing that precious sense of peace? I'm not sure how it will all work out, but I think it must involve planning a lot less. This is an admonishment mostly to myself, the big social planner! However I have realized there is something to be said for spontaneity, and leaving space on the calendar. It might also mean saying no a little more, so we can say yes more wholeheartedly. I read a great description recently that likened the writer's family to 'barbarians at the gates' in their desire to always get together that I must say rang a little true for me. As children of divorce I am not entirely sure what Greg and I can do about that, but we have promised each other that our own little family will come first. Most important is that I think we have now experienced and enjoyed ordinary time; if we let it, I think its blessings will come home with us in our suitcase.